Life is too fragile

A sudden thought stoke my mind, lingering and urging me to scribble something out from my wandering mind. It's nothing else but something about life. Well~ I'm neither too young nor too old to know about life. Definitely I gonna share something that match my age as I live along. 

Reminiscence....

What is life means to you???

Daddy and mommy give you life that you could life? Is that all???

I have been thinking - my life is in my hand and only I can make changes and live a life that I desire. I could work like a bull; play like an idiot; study like a bookworm; spending as if I were a billionaire; achieving dreams as if I were the next Armstrong. Well~ no doubt it is very true. Indeed this is the kind of life that most of us are going through to earn a living in this so called information age.. 

I have been reading the 8th Habit book recently. I came across something that was actually the same in the Bible. I could not remember the exact words but it is something like this "The fundamental reality is that human beings are not things needing to be motivated and controlled; they are four dimensional : Body, Mind, Heart and Spirit." For those who had read the bible of course you know what I am crapping about - it was written in the bibles thousand years ago... and people are discovering making new findings to wake us up from the 'systems'.. 

Hmm, by the way, I wrote and share on these do not mean that I know and practice every single stuffs in the bible.. Well, I have read; I know about it.. but I am not awaken/enlightened by the so called teachings in the bible. Felt ashamed. 

Another great sentence that enlightened me is that "Everyone chooses one of two roads in life - the old and the young, the rich and the poor, men and women like. One is the broad, well travelled road to mediocrity, the other to greatness and meaning." Definitely this reminded me of the poem written by Robert Frost "The Road Not Taken." Everyone of us are given choices to choose.. we lead and live out life via the choices that we've made every single moment.

I have been so confident in my life (at least most of the time).. not until an incident which stroke my heart and hold me back. We work like a slave of the earth for something unforeseen.. Some say, I plan/work/live for my future; I plan/work/live for my family; or even I plan/work/live for the country... wow~ sound so grand. 

Well, we could plan and work out the plan very well.. but what is the things we often neglected??? Our Body, Heart, Mind and Spirit.. Don't you think so??? 

I get the news from my sister yesterday, it was indeed a shocking news that kept me in a shocking mode for the rest of the day.. my cousin's husband passed away. For you information my cousin is quite young.. in the mid of her 30s so did her husband. They have a happy family with 2 very young kids.. and one of them might not even recognized her dad yet. Things rumbled when her husband passed away with an unknown disease attacking his brain.. 

Immediately these few verses pop up in my mind; 

Luke 12:16-20 And He told them a parable, saying, The land of a certain rich man brought forth abundantly. And he reasoned in himself, saying, What shall I do, for I have no place where I may gather my crops? And he said, I will do this: I will tear down my barns and build larger ones, and I will gather there all my wheat and my goods. And I will say to my soul, Soul, you have many goods laid up for many years; rest, beat, drink, be merry. But God said to him, Foolish one, this night they are requiring your soul from you; and the things which you have prepared, whose will they be?

Luke 12:22-24 And He said to His disciples, Therefore I say to you, Do not be anxious for your life, what you should eat; nor for your body, what you should put on; For the life is more than food, and the body more than clothing. Consider the ravens. They neither sow nor reap, they have neither storehouse nor barn; yet God nourishes them. How much more valuable are you than the birds!

Our life is in the hand of our creator - the Almighty God. I shall be reminded that "Life is more than food, and the body more than clothing." I can pursue a lot of things yet I shall not forget to nurture my Body, Heart, Mind and Spirit for something eternal. 

OMG OMG~ Yun's hair got struck by Lightning

Yun accompanied a friend to get her hair perm.. Hmmm~ Too bad in the end Yun was influenced by the  offer that the saloon provide.. (could you resists 50% off for one person if you come in pair?). In the end Yun get her hair perm as well.

This was done at Artist (near Travillion) by Jericho (a famous stylist in Kuching). 

Hmm~ Guess what was Yun's expression when Yun saw her hair..

.

.

.

OMG~ Can you please make it a little bit flatter???

Jericho looked at me in unbelievable and shock mode.. 

Well, I suppose this is called perm~~ 

Share with Yun's reader current Yun's hair style.

Front view

Side view_1

Side View_2.

How do you feel about Yun's hair? 

Sadly to say, Yun's still getting use to the new hair style.. 

Kinda weird for d very first time with curly hair after 25 years of straight hair~ 

Anyway, getting a new hairstyle for the new year and a new start.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year in advance. ^^

How much you loved your beloved one?

There is always a wondering in my mind that how much you loved your beloved one? My friend, Anthony, just called me announcing to me a great shocking news that it took me few seconds to come back to myself.

Two souls could come together as a lover is a destiny. There is millions of human being on this earth yet you are able to meet him/her to be your partner isn’t it a mystery? I strongly believed that two person could come together or even being detached because there is destiny. Being together or detached need destiny!

Anthony requested me to read the newspaper date 24^th February 2009. There isn’t anything that I would like to share about the news just to start of my sharing I would touch on the story line of the happening. Two persons involved, Ken and his girlfriend. Ken’s girlfriend requested to end their relationship due to some matters that none of the outsiders know besides both of them. Because of love, Ken could not bear the decision made by his girlfriend. Thus, out of controlled he slaughtered (this is the word that I'm using!) his girlfriend then trying to commit suicide. Unfortunately, Ken was just injured but his girlfriend was send to ICU for emergency treatments! Now, Ken was charged for attempting killing and drugs trafficking (which was found by police at his home).

I really could not figure out what had happened to Ken. He is my primary school buddy and we had not met each other since we left our primary school should be about 13 years! What had happened to Ken in these 13 years? Is really unbelievable a brilliant kid from a good family could turn into such a violent guy. Is love that changes a person or a person changes for love? Different people could have different explanations.

Oh well, my definition for love might be different from the other and you might not agree with me but this is my feeling. Love involves both giving and receiving. Two souls come together is not just merely giving or receiving but is both giving and receiving. Love is to let the other part felt secured and happy. When you are in the valley, he is there bearing with you. When you are in the heaven, he is there sharing with you. Love that filled with trust, patience, and encouragements would able to lead all through least you are not loving each other. Even being detached, never stir up the hatred but bless for his or her happiness. Like I mentioned before, being detached is also a destiny.

Though I lost the faith in true love, I still believe that there is true love. It is just that you have not met the one that God had designated for you. For those who are attached do love your beloved one with trust, patience and encouragements. Be their refuge and happiness that is the true love that you should go for.

My messy office desk..

It was really a stressful day, things that I had planned come out the other way round.. what a disappointed day...

It was nearly 7pm, I did not realized that after Lai and Hang Seng said good bye to me, only me alone in the big, creepy office..
when I turn around, I found the office vacanted!!! Take the opportunity to capture the whole office wow...

Anyway, I could not bother much.. working very hard to get my image analysis out..

Here it is my messy desk..

My desk - in the middle of war

Empty, silent, creepy... office

Haha.. another day passed.. I gonna love and hate this place very much..

My messy reading desk

Start my hobby again.. It had been a long time since I really spend some time on my blog. Busy busy busy and just busy... What a life!!!

Today, gonna enjoy myself blogging.. ^-^

Last few days got on hold of a wonderful camera. Take the opportunity to capture some of my reading room photos... This is the condition of my table while I was extremely busy and stress up.. These were captured at 2:40am!!! After I finished all the image analysis...







Though I had arranged it a bit.. It was still a mess.. Haha.. Ashamed.. :p
Had been thinking that I need a larger desk!!! hehe..

To be an Overcomers

Today I am going to share on something marvelous which I’d gain in last weekend conference. This conference helped and encouraged me in my Christian life and thus I’m here again to share on the treasure that I’d gain to all my friends.

A brother from the United States, brother David, began the conference by directing us a question, “Are you willing to be an overcomer? Are you willing to make the choice?”

This is a matter of choice. God gives us the rights to choose just like Adam and Eve. God gives us the freedom to choose but are we willing to make the choice? What choice? The choice of being an overcomer!

Previously, I had a thinking of what for I had to be an overcomer? I just have to live a simple live. I do not need great achievement, fame, fortune… I just need a simple yet happy life which I believe most of us have this kind of feeling as well. We just have to go to campus, get a degree or master or even doctoral degree, then getting into the working society, getting married with a good husband or wife, children, taking care of family and eventually collapse. Besides, I had a kind of feeling that I just need to be ordinary and normal Christian, I do not have the burden nor feeling that I should involved very much and in deep in the church life which is categorized as unimportant to me. This is the kind of life that I thought and I am going to live as well.

This time conference, God reveals to me that to be an overcomer is not that I had to be spiritual hero. Is just an ordinary Christian living an ordinary life, loving the God with their whole heart, mind, soul and strength! In Mark 12:30 And you shall love the Lord your God from your whole heart and from your whole soul and from your whole mind and from your whole strength. To be an overcomer is important! For God need overcomer as His dispensational instrument.

I realised that it is not in a blink of eye that we would become an overcomer. It is through our daily life, through many little things in our daily life, the accumulation of decisions on things (from tiny little bean matter to big problems) in our daily life that we overcome with the overcoming Christ within us will make us the overcomer. It is not that we can do or perform but it is the Christ, the overcoming Christ, within us will overcome. In John 16:33 it says that These things I have spoken to you that in Me you may have peace. In the world you have affliction, but take courage; I have overcome the world.

Praise the Lord! He had overcome the world. I believe and I trust in His world He had overcome the world and everything that has been begotten of God overcomes the world.

To overcome something, the resistance within us, need a great effort. Whether I could overcome is all voice down to whether I want to make a choice? I am very much in touch when brother shared that will we overcome? We need to make a choice! The choice is in our hand! I might fail but I could prayer to the Lord that by Your grace and mercy I am able to overcome! For God is faithful, for the good work that He had started He will definitely accomplished.

However, in order to accomplish His work God’s work needs our cooperation. We need to cooperate with God. The first and the foremost thing is the dealing of our heart. Prayed to God to take away the veils within our heart, to dig away all the stones within our heart that we could received Him. The more we receive Him, the more we would know Him. I was very much in lack of knowing God. I still don’t know Him neither do I recognized His voice. If I know Him, I will overcome all things in my life, for the overcoming Christ overcome everything!

May the Lord grant me ears that could listen. Listen to His words and His speaking that I would be renewed day by day and by the little choices that I made in my daily life, choose the tree of life, He is able to make me an overcomer!

In 1 Peter 5:7-8, Casting all your anxiety on Him because it matters to Him concerning you. Be sober, watch. Your adversary, the devil, as roaring lion, walks about, seeking someone to devour. We are born to be in this world under satanic chaos but we are not belonged to satan. Praise the Lord. I treasure that to be an overcomer is not being delivered out of the satanic chaos, instead they conquer the destructive satanic chaos and triumph in the constructive divine economy. They do suffer in the chaos but instead of being disappointed or discouraged, they are strengthened by the all sufficient grace. I just realized that how much I need to know and apply the all sufficient grace to remain in His flow of life that by this overcoming Christ I would be able to overcome all things in my life.

I really need to learn to have faith and to believe even at this very moment. I am worried about my research; I am not able to found the solutions. In state of being bounded by the pressure and anxiety, I began to blog again to write out the enjoyment that encourages me last few days. It reminded me again to have faith. Casting all my anxiety unto God for it matters to Him concerning me. I need to be sober!

In our daily life, I was enlightened that I need to faithfully run the course that God had assigned to me. God had assigned me some course, but am I faithful? I am not! I am rebellious! May the Lord grant me mercy, shine on me that I would positively gazed upon God while running the course. Beside that I must behold and look away unto Jesus that I would be encouraged and be persistence with endurance to finish my course. Is not that I could but I need to apply the all-sufficient grace of God.

I was enlightened this morning when a sister called me to help her up in some of her complicated situations that drag her down. She shared to me regarding her life, her studies. Deep within me, I praise the Lord for enable me to be there at that time. Though I am busy and have my own research analysis to be carried out, I spare the time for her, for I know that she is more important than my research analysis. I didn’t do much; I just listen to her and pray for her deep in my heart. There is nothing that I could do to help her up. Only God could give her peace within that she is able to move on in her life. Now I realized that why brother mention about come to meet together! Meetings encourage and strengthen each other’s faith. This noon, I purposely request to go to Jalan Song to have lunch, is not that I have a lot of time to spare but I would like to meet brother and sisters that I would be encouraged by the Christ within them. We all have different kind of complicated situations but Praise the Lord that we could come together to encourage each other to go on in the course!

Relief..

Wow.. got very excited when my image analysis eventually come out with something that is more representative.. Rather than all the messy vectors flowing around.. a great relief indeed..

Take time to browse around for ticketss... GOING HOME!!!!!! YEA... Plan to have a really long holiday this time.. take time to pamper myself with some good rest.. Dun care!!! Hahaha.. :p

See how long is my holiday?

This is the first time i'm that bold to skip all the work.. haha..
**(See whether I would bring work back home to do or not... haha.. :p)

Colours..

This few days when I was having a deep thought on some important matters. I just realised that when man lost his directions all things could happen.

Try to view at this photo.. What is in your mind and what can you see from this photo?

I could only said that, I could only view colours.. patches of colours!!! Other than that I could see nothing! If I were to be placed in the photos which colour I choose to be? Red, yellow, marroon, blue, cyan, grey, black...

I'm the one who determine the colours of my life..

Though most of the time I can't change the outward situation. I was forced to do things and was forced to be placed and to be forced to be who I am.. There is one thing that I realised, even thought now I was in grey, little white dot in grey could brightened up the grey. Who is willing to place that little white dot in my life?

A friend of mine, remind me of colours that he had lasted spoken to me before met a misfortune and left. I hate this kind of feeling.. not only grey but black.. so dark that I could see NOTHING!!! Just NOTHING.. I thought my life is going to be grey and black forever.. I close myself up from colours..

Luckily, God still have mercy on me, He give me few dots of colours (bright colours) that ensure me that I still have lots of hope.. He gives me stars...

When you view this photo, what you see? You noticed the dark background or you see the bright dots..

I see bright dots..

I'm thankful that I was still given a chance. Though I'm not sure how long would I be here.. but one thing for sure is that I still have you. I have all of you.. my dearest frens, family, brothers and sisters.

火柴

走在寒冷，下雪的夜空，
奮力，逆行著寒冷的風
托著一羅未點燃的火柴
盼望在某個地方停下點燃。

寒冷的風痛斥著我的臉，
冰冷，刺痛的腳繼續向前跨，
不料沸騰的淚珠從眼眶流下，
我何時才能停下﹗

前面的路好長，好冷，好模糊…
不停的在摸索，尋找
好累﹗好累﹗是否可以停下了?
是這裡嗎?

點燃火柴﹐微微的光芒﹐
照耀並溫暖我的臉﹐
望着那光﹐漸漸的消失﹐
微笑陪伴我過了…

(七月二十八日)

In Lab again!!!

Welcome to my lab again. This time, the photos were captured by an intruder who sneaked into my lab and looked for me for lunch... Whahaha... (Dun get angry oh... :p) haha...

See how efficient I'm working.. :p

Full concentration while working.. Don't realise the time past.. 'Just for a while!!!' hahaha... My a while is one hour gua i think... Poor guy, have to wait for me nearly an hour for lunch.. hahaha... Sorry... :( Next time me cia.. :p


Yipee.. going to enjoy my dunno what to do work.. :p
Thanks for all the encouragements, cares, the accompanying and jokes.. :p

In my Lab..

Another day gone, suddenly felt that I need to write something today! I take a long walk around the campus today. Felt aimless... Just realised that I have stayed here for 4 years already!!! Wow... I had missed lots of joy here..

Just want to share that have to treasure all things around you before you missed it!!! This is my mood today while carrying out my lab work.. Though it is hard, I will take things easy.. :p

When I turn around, I realised that I had miss a lot.. Thanks for all the encouragementss and caress.. ^-^

Thanks Haji for the photos and spending time to joke with me to release the tense.. :p

Before...

Don't know how do you feel when view this photos.. Beware!!!.. volcano's going to erupt anytime.. hehe... :p (So tense..)

During
Capturing and inputing the images (Just posting..)

Take a break for peace!!!

Hehe.. another one.. (Qi Xiao d)

After

Hehe.. analysing the hardest part.. see I will smile and continue on again... Gambatae... Yea.. ^-^

Draw me one step further..

Lord Jesus draw me, one step further

Draw me, Lord from where I am

I’ve been here too long already

Move me, Lord I know You can.

Your whisper, Lord, so softly sounding

Deep within my heart does burn

Let Your stillness now subdue me

That Your feeling I discern.

All idle thoughts and impure feelings

Lord, remove from mind and heart

Wash me in the crystal water

And more life to me impart.

All heathen things that block my vision

Rocks of self-ambition, pride

Now expose and burn away, Lord

By Your look intensify.

Increase the weight of glory in me

Let Your Spirit now transform

That all things would not be wasted

But would work to save me more.

Lord Jesus, Oh how much I need You

Thank You Lord, that You are here

Ever present as the Body

I would always seek You there.

It was by the mercy of God that I came across this hymn once again. Time really flee, without my realisation it had been 3 weeks since I came back from Bintulu.. Having all kinds of services and my own research work really worn me out.. Thinking over what had I done in this few weeks really have to repent to God for being rebellious, unfaithful, blind...

I had been here too long. I do not know what's others situation. I need to come back, back to the tree of life, back to Christ.

Many time I strive to put things down, strive to do many things.. remind me of stanza 3

"All heathen things that block my vision

Rocks of self-ambition, pride

Now expose and burn away, Lord

By Your look intensify."

I could not remain in the same situation. I need to rise up. Back! Remembered once a brother said, "We need to exercise before God, not man!" This sentence come into my mind reminding me that I could choose to give up, give up all things (all the exercises and practices).. It was only going to prove that all this while, I had gain no Christ!!! I just gain a view in others mind.. If I really gain Christ and being touch by Him deeply I won't be who I am now at this moment!

Though I do not think this way, my daily life in this few weeks really show. Showing that how weak I am, just too weak!!! In all practices and exercise, I just could not make it.. Though there is a great will, but my body and my mind could not afford it!

In the book of Mark, For Everything is possible to God! Before this verse, Jesus said that it is easier for a camel to enter into the eye of the needle than a rich man enter into the kingdom of God.. How could it be? How could a huge camel enter the eye of the needle? Is through all the processes.. Being renewed and being transformed.. In the process of being renewed and transformed, there are times we might fall and become weak but this is a process.

This remembered me of how i learn to walk when I was a babe. I fall down, hurt.. there was tears.. But once the process is done, see I can walk and run properly now!!!

Thank God for the dizziness today that I'm not able to continue on my things. Refreshed myself and move on again.

Consecration is all that matters!!!

Happy Birthday..

It was my 24th year old birthday.. Having a quite surprise and wonderful birthday celebration. Before the clock struck sharp 12am of 3rd Sept 2008, a sis and my 'gua lui' called to sing a birthday song to me.. wow SURPRISE and very touch!!! :) In 2 minutes time, another brother called to sang another birhtday song to me.. my heart melt... hehe.. so toucing.. what a memorable time, it was the first time in my life that someone called to sing birthday song to me.. Thanks...

Thanks to all my friends around the world for the sms and emails.. thanks that i am still in your heart.. so touching that it kept me awake till 3:30am.. doing my data analsying and also sms.. :p (Still smile in the dream!!! :p)

Too bad still have do my duty rooster and then have to go to lab to do my lab work.. another rushing day.. before going to lab, I take time to meet my supervisor who required me to come out with 150 sets of data last week.. I could not manage to produce the results... thus, i went to talk to her about the problems occured and the constrains in the lab work.. who knows she said, "Then you analysed first 1 set of data and we would discuss about it when the data come out!!!" Wow.. I was so happy.. for your information i just manage to produce 4 sets of data in 2 days lab work.. still have a lot to do before reaching 150s... even i stay overnight in lab also not able to come out with it.. too bad.. :(

Arriving at the lab.. with a super happy mood start doing my lab work.. another wishes faraway from Malaysia pop up... received another birthday song from my special best friend.. hehe.. so lovely and touch.. :) hehe..

Anyway, half way doing my lab work, stomach began to boycott for i forgot to take my breakfast.. :p.. so sweet my dearest brother bought me lunch.. haha.. thanks bro.. muaks..

Whole week tired of lab work and writings.. my mind had a great plan.. I'm going to paint the town red tonight.. hehe..
Got 'dian dian' and CS accompanied me for dinner at 'Memory'.. the garlic bread taste so nice.. but the beef noodle onli so so.. I ordered for 2 (Beef noodle and Laksa) so greedy.. but at the end 'Dian Dian' have to finish it.. hehe.. sorry 'dian dian'.. :p
Then we went for cake!!! Yea cake.. this time marble cheesecake... Yummy!!!

Around 11:15pm, I plan to go for movie.. too bad.. CS is sick.. cancel the movie.. have to go home lo.. On the way back home.. Guess what happen to the one who suggest going for movie????!!!




FALL ASLEEP!!!

Hehe.. still haven't paint the town red already collapse.. too tired... Reaching home.. Take a bath!!! Treat myself with a great rest, put aside all the work... Zzzz... :)

Anyway, posting this up to thank all my beloved one.. thanks for your encouragements and time.. I treasure it..

Gambatae... Yun!!!

A new start for new Yun. Gambatae!!!
Just realized that I'm too weak... I need a hand! A hand that only He could give...

I enjoy this hymn recently, consecrate myself over and over again to move on..

To You,

dear Lord,

I give myself afresh again,

Unsparingly for Your desire, Your economy,

Oh fire from above, come and consume me thoroughly,

that You can be my all, my life, my everything.

It's Your mercy and Your love,

that I can give myself to You,

It takes eternity to know is worth to You to me..

Gambatae... ^-^ Yun can make it...

Antoher Outing

Another outing with some of the sisters after half day training... Bringing some of the new students to visit around Kuching and of course not to forget to bring them here to The Spring... We are quite lucky as that day there were few exhibitions going on.. The wedding photography and the luxury car display.. sure we are going to make ourselves the model... share with you all the events and photos...

Top view of The Spring

The red carpet for couples... wedding..

Nice ballon design..

Kathy, Peih Ling and I
Ju Imm, Peih Ling and I
Hihi.. Me the model for BMW... with latest hair-style :p
Another capture..
3 of us again... Ju Imm, Me and Kathy
Erica, Me, Ju Imm and Kathy
Me and Ju Imm

Have a wonderful time capture photos around.. Time to go back!!! Da da... more photos soon coming..

四年大學生活

得知我將要在砂大就讀﹐真的好失望﹗
到我不願意去的地方就讀…
嗨…
沒辦法﹐為了不要爸爸媽媽傷心硬着頭皮去吧﹗
可是為了抗議﹐
臨去前還把長髮剪到好短﹐嚇壞我的父母啦﹗
就這樣從民都魯飛到了古晉。

從機場步出﹐看到微微的陽光﹐我真的到了﹗
臉上一個微笑也沒有。
好虧欠到機場接我和幾個姊妹的弟兄們。
嚇壞他們了﹗
給他們的印象應該是﹐哇﹗好酷 + 凶啊﹗
就這樣開始了我大學生涯
嗨﹐還能怎樣?
不管如何我都要盡力拿個文憑﹐
如果不盡力到最好的學校也沒用。。。

這幾年﹐可說是過得好不簡單。
每一年都是把我變成我自己不願意成為的人。
每一年身邊的朋友都說同一句話﹐ “你真的變了﹗”
我到底變了什麼樣子? 我自己也不曉得?
是好是歹? 從來沒有人對我說。
只知道他們第二句就是﹐ “我們還是比較喜歡以前的你﹗”
你到底發生了什麼事?
真正的你到哪裡去了?
你的鬥志到哪裡去了?
你的性格到哪裡去了?
你的意志﹐好勝﹐驕傲﹐同情﹐酷… 到哪裡去了?
我還在﹗

我還在﹐只是長大了﹗
用不同眼光看待每一件事。
我的鬥志﹐
我的性格﹐
我的意志…
都還在﹐只是被磨過變了形狀而已。

在這幾年﹐我認識了一位主﹐
一位我以往非常抗拒的﹐
我可惜認識他太晚。
是他的愛拖住我這頑固的小孩。
每一次﹐
放蕩﹐他來教訓﹐
失望﹐他來安慰﹐
孤單﹐他來陪伴﹐
軟弱﹐他來加強﹐
無助﹐他賜溫暖的手﹐
傷心﹐他來擦干我的眼淚。
他是何等的一位。

每一年﹐
為了保守我這位頑固的小孩﹐
主用他萬邦的智慧﹐
使我漸漸的向他敞開﹐
雖然時常很不用意﹐
到後來還得給認輸﹗

主他何等的愛我。
以往我不認識主，認為他是無情的
但主他還是憐憫小子
用他的愛繼續來溶化我這一個人。

在這几年，主用個樣的環境來破碎
環境一波未停一波又來。
一個人在無助時想起我還有一位主，
一位可愛的救主。

如今四年的大專的生涯就要成歷史，
但我所學習的不僅僅是所修的科系
乃是在課業上無法學習的功課。
主在我身上所做的一切不是徒然的。

最近, 應著升學的事, 有點失望。
矛盾的心情一直浮現…
相照著自己想往的地方去,
不是為了夢想,也不是為了學業, 難道我是為了要他失望,傷心?
我要報酬? 可是這又何必? 傷害到的不是他而是你自己…
到底我為甚麼會這樣? 我怎麼啦?
我知道我應但作甚麼, 我當走的路是如何。
但是我還要在那裡兜圈子.. 不肯順服,不肯相信, 不肯… 就是不肯…
“奧秘的人…” 這一句話, 我不知道他的意釋, 我也不想猜。應為我的事沒有他的事… 又不是我的誰, 為甚麼要聽他的… 應為做決定的是我, 不要以別人為我考盧的焦點。我的生活沒有人能為我做決定。 可能主能!
我總與鼓起勇氣做了決定. 心頭上的重石頭, 終於肯放下了… 真的不明白為甚麼我要選這麼艱難的路來走。只有一句話可形容, “笨” 。

最後決定乃是留在沙大, 繼續MASTER。 不要在想了… 累了! 在主里享受平安。 作個在神手中有用的器皿。 要做一個有價值的才德的婦人, 我真的要負代價, 一生對主有意無損。 操練以至與敬虔。 愿主憐憫我。

Disapointed!!!

My mood is grey right now!!! Although my vacation starts tomorrow, I've lost the mood for the vacation!

I appreciated my friends for their arrangement for the trip and they really put efforts into it. The trip to Sabah. This is the first time i join their plans and it seems disappointing. I really can't imagine how could their arrange for the trip without proper arrangement for the accomodation! Are we going to stay over night along the road side or at the bus station???

Receiving the sms from my freind I was shock!!! Asking me to book hotel at this time!!! Now is 11.25pm!!! Hello... anybody there wanna accept our booking!!!

Anyway hopefully the trip won't have any big problem that 4 of us can't deal with it...
Now I just wanna have a shout...
AAaaaaaaaaaaa.......................................
Ehm...
Feel better...
Hihihi... Cheers for tomorrow... life will be better..
God Blessed...

Tears drop on the guitar...

This few days I have a very complicated feeling.
Alone at home, I strum on the guitar to get rid of my boredom. Singing the hymns that I used to sung all the hymns that I loved… in my four years university life.
I notice one hymn named “Lord, You are my beloved!” singing over the hymns, without my notice, tears drop unto the guitar. So much memory refreshed…
Lord, You are my beloved…
It’s not for me. I am too complicated. Clung unto so many things that drag me away from what I suppose to be. I still searching for me myself few years back! Where am I??? The real Yun!!! Where is it???

Life with simplicity. Pure heart.
A new start for me. Everything a new start. Forgive me if you think that I’m selfish!

What do you think?

"What lies behind you, what lies before you, does not compare to what lies within you... "

What do you think about this quote?
The firsrt time I saw it was on the way to Hamilton... It's really enlightened me of a lots of things... many times we may complains and murmured a lot on the situations or circumtances around us..
Our pass? Our future? Either it is full of joy, pain... does it really matter? Things will come and leave... the most important things is what is within you!!! What lies within you is the governing criteria for you either to move on, to slow down or even to stop completely...

So what lies within you? If you suffering right now or just anything...! Care for the one that lies within you... and you will know where should go...

A New Blog...

This is the new blog that I will be using.
Too many chaos blogs... Anyway, hopefully this is the one that I will really work on it...
Enjoy visting...